Frequently Asked Questions About Therapy
It can be intimidating to take the first step and reach out to a therapist! I’ve answered some basic questions about therapy below to help shed light on the topic.
What is therapy, anyway?
In my opinion, therapy above all else should be a safe, comfortable place where you know you’ll be heard, validated, and understood, but challenged when appropriate. You should never feel judged or pushed to work on something you’re not ready to. Change requires discomfort and therapy may be uncomfortable at times, but you should always feel supported by your therapist during these growing pains.
What’s the difference between the terms “therapy” and “counseling”?
Essentially nothing. I use them interchangeably.
What type of therapy does Inner Nourish Counseling provide?
I work from a client-centered foundation, where the work is collaborative rather than a therapist-treating-client approach. I listen, reflect, validate, encourage, and help you identify both your strengths as well as areas that need growth. I help you explore your past and what you want your future to look like. I challenge you when appropriate. I sometimes offer my opinion or share a similar experience I’ve had and how I handled it (or failed).
I also like to take techniques and skills from other approaches when they seem like they might be helpful for you. I use mindfulness a lot and encourage meditation. I try to facilitate an awareness of and a connection to your body, and encourage finding a type of movement that excites you. I also emphasize the importance of connecting with others and oneself in a meaningful way. Spirituality (whatever that means for you) - being in nature, practicing traditional religion, going to yoga class - can be so essential in facilitating the healing process. It strengthens the belief I am not alone.
Psychoeducation (learning about psychology or mental health in more depth) is sometimes necessary so that you have a better understanding of what may be happening in your brain that you may or may not have control over. I may suggest books or articles for “homework”.
I’m always 100% myself in sessions. I strive to be genuine, authentic, kind, and nonjudgemental. I let my quirks and flaws show. I believe the most important message for clients to take home after a session with me is “we are all human”.
I also offer EMDR Therapy, which I encourage most of my clients to consider because it is so versatile, effective, and amazingly transformational. But of course this is a decision that we would come to together - whether or not EMDR is the right path for your healing journey. You can read more about it here. If it’s not something you’re interested in pursuing, traditional talk therapy is still a great option!
What types of therapy are there in general?
Too many to list! But some popular ones today include EMDR (my specialty), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), to name a few. Methods can range from psychoanalytic therapy (think Freud), to equine therapy (with horses), and play therapy for kiddos. There are hundreds of theories and philosophies about therapy, and there is no right one.
Many people think of therapy as lying on a couch talking to Freud about one’s childhood. And if that’s the type of therapy you’re into - go for it. But there are so many different types of therapy and it’s not one size fits all. You have to figure out what you need, and find a therapist who can be that for you. It might take a couple tries to find the right fit. Do you like someone to be more direct or mostly listen? Do you want a therapist who will share a little about his/her life and experiences or be a closed book? Do you value going into the office or does teletherapy (via video chat) help you feel more comfortable?
How long will it take for me to feel better?
Therapy takes time. There is no magic answer, and everyone is different. Do you have a specific problem you’re wanting to solve? Or are you into more exploratory therapy? Do you have years of trauma or a few areas in your life you’d like to improve? These factors will determine how long you’ll be in therapy for. I generally say to give it 6 months, and if you don’t feel like it’s been helpful, then re-evaluate your therapist or type of therapy.
Does it mean I’m weak if I go to therapy?
It’s ok to need or want help. I actually believe acknowledging when you need help and asking for it takes more strength than going it alone. Vulnerability does not equal weakness. Opening up and sharing takes courage. And if you’re not into the touchy-feely argument, two minds are usually better than one.
The stigma around mental health/illness is lifting in our society, but there’s still lots of room for improvement. Talking about what you’re going through with friends or family may even encourage them to seek therapy. Everyone struggles with something. No one is problem- or worry-free. START TALKING!
If you’re a therapist, it must mean you have it all figured out and don’t struggle with mental health, right?
Oh how wrong this is. Sometimes we’re the worst! What I’ve noticed is that a lot of therapists are drawn to be counselors because they’ve experienced mental health issues of their own and want to help others in similar situations. I personally struggle with anxiety and depression, and even though I manage it fairly well now, I absolutely remember what it was like at its worst. This makes it easier for me to understand what clients are going through. It always helps to feel like you’re not alone.
Why is therapy so expensive?
$120 a session?? If this seems outrageous at first, let me explain. You should know where your dollars are going and why.
Therapy is an intimate, emotional experience for therapists, too. I truly care about every single one of my clients. It takes an immense amount of emotional, mental, and physical energy to sit with someone’s deepest and most intense experiences. AND THEN we need to be able to respond in a helpful and meaningful way. After a full week (which is not 40 face-to-face hours by the way), I am pretty drained. Fulfilled for sure. But also tired.
We have graduate degrees and extensive, specialized training. Also loans.
Therapists in private practice are self-employed. We do not:
have paid time off
have included health insurance
have included retirement plans
get paid for a full 40 hours/week (see first bullet point)
Taxes and expenses (rent, professional fees, etc) are taken out after the fact. So this means that $120 does not go straight into my pocket.
Insurance companies pay therapists around HALF of what a session is valued at. This encourages therapists to take on more clients than they can handle in order to pay bills, which leads to burnout and less than quality care.
It is worth every penny to pay for a therapist who is a good fit for you and who can legitimately help you change your life. Can you even put a price on your mental health? INVEST in yourself.
What will we talk about?
It depends on the day, really. Some sessions are light and more of a check-in, while some are heavy, deep, and intense. Therapy is absolutely about you and your needs, and you set the agenda. However I am happy to provide suggestions and guidance if you’d like.
I believe everyone should experience therapy at least once in their lives.