5 Ways to Survive the Holidays

Your mother-in-law. Endless amounts of food and sweets. Gifts.

Each one of these things could be wonderful, or horrifying, depending on your state of mind.

The holidays can be stressful! I've noticed it more in the last few years - clients coming in saying "I hate the holidays". It's supposed to be a time to spend with family and friends, enjoy each other's company, and be grateful for love and good health. But it's turned into pressure to spend a ridiculous amount of money on the perfect gifts for everyone and to appear on social media like you have the perfect family.

And it's not just Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, or whichever holiday(s) you celebrate. New Year's Eve can create pressure to have the ideal plans. A low-key celebration of the new year with your partner in front of the TV can be just as (or more) fun than going out and fighting the crowds at expensive parties.

Read on for tips to have a healthier and more peaceful end of the year.

1. Back off on the social media consumption.

Studies have shown social media makes people unhappy. Even Sean Parker, Facebook's former president, admits that the site "purposely exploits human vulnerability". He says the idea behind social media success is to ask the question, "How do we consume as much of your time and conscious attention as possible?" Not only does comparing ourselves to the highlight reel of "friends'" (is that person you met once 5 years ago really your friend?) lives lead to feelings of inadequacy, but around the holidays Facebook targets you specifically with ads to create pressure to buy, buy, buy. More on social media in another article. 

You don't have to quit cold turkey (pun intended), but being mindful and limiting the amount of time you spend scrolling can affect your subconscious in a positive way. Play board games with your family instead, or if you need a break, take your dog for a walk around the block.

2. Set specific boundaries with a relative or friend that you have a difficult relationship with.

Does your [insert rude relative here] criticize the partner you choose to bring to family events at every possible turn? Or make inappropriate and unwanted comments about your weight? This year, don't let him/her get away with making you feel uncomfortable. You don't have to make a scene or insult this person to get your message across. But you can calmly and privately let them know that their comments are unwelcome and you would appreciate it if they would refrain from inserting their opinion about your life into otherwise pleasant conversation.

This friend or relative will probably not like this boundary and may get upset, but you'll feel proud that you finally stood up for yourself! 

3. Take time for yourself. Listen to your limits.

Don't feel guilty for leaving the party or going to bed early if your body is telling you it's time to go. Especially for introverts, a constant stream of music, questions about when you're getting married, and small talk can be exhausting. Don't let your hosts try to guilt you into staying longer than you want to. This doesn't mean leave immediately after dinner, but remember that it's ok to take care of yourself.

4. Be active.

We all know exercise is good for us. Hopefully you already have some sort of routine that you enjoy. It's easy to get off track around the holidays, but this year make it a priority to stick to at least some version of your regimen. You won't feel so guilty for having that third piece of pie, and the endorphins will help you to stay calm if you get frustrated with a friend or family member.

It's also a good escape if you're visiting and staying with family out of town and need some alone time. Find a gym and buy a guest day pass or bring your running shoes.

5. Eat mindfully.

Food is one of the primary focuses of the holidays. Most people talk about "putting on holiday weight", but this doesn't have to happen. Practice awareness of why you're eating that cookie/chocolate/extra plate of mac n cheese. If it's because you're still hungry or just want some dessert, by all means go for it. But if it's because you're eating your angry feelings toward your stepdad, this isn't healthy.

Practicing mindfulness while eating dinner can also stop you from overeating. It makes your meal more enjoyable to pay attention to the taste, texture, smell, and feel of your food. You'll appreciate it more.

And if all else fails, spike the eggnog.

Just kidding ;)